Ashley Greene Nude Photos Take Internet by Storm

Ashley Greene naked scandal pays scumbags like me -- Woot!

First of all, I have no idea who Ashley Greene is or why she's famous, and I'm not even going to go to the trouble of looking it up. All I care is that she showed her boobs on camera, and that means that I can put up a blog post about it and within minutes hundreds of shallow boobhounds will find my blog! Sweet! I could blog about finance or politics all day, and nobody would care. Put up a post about some no-talent nobody "celebrity" baring her titties, you reap a bonanza on the stampede of traffic it brings.

And we wonder why the economy is messed up! We've become a nation of breast fiends and celebrity stalkers. Who cares if I give you the best investment advice in the world. That makes you money. Who cares about money? It's all about the cheesecake, baby, and apparently Ashley Greene is givin' it up.

So thank you, Ashley Greene, whoever you are, for being such a kind-hearted celebrity and helping lowly bloggers like me to cash in on your 15 minutes!

Just remember, girls: No matter how much you think you love the guy, if you take off your clothes for his camera and subsequently get famous or rich, he'll get paid one way or the other. That's how guys roll. We like women who get naked for us, but we like women who get us paid even more!